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Ecstasy of St. Gemma: 61-65

The Ecstasies of St. Gemma, a powerful testimony of faith

Ecstasy 61

She feels strong attractions towards Jesus, who makes her experience many sweetnesses in Communion and promises to be her husband (Cf. P. GERM n. IV).

Wednesday 20 November 1901.

O Lord!… O Jesus!… or what are these strong attractions that unite me so powerfully with you? It is your heart, Jesus, that beats on mine… What power of love!… Can you explain it to me, Jesus, why this poor soul does not escape from this prison to come to heaven to enjoy your divine presence?. .. This soul cannot…. but I hear your dear voice every morning, Jesus; I taste many sweets…
Jesus… Lord, this morning every time I raise my mind to you, it seems to me that you are giving me a reproach.
Jesus… you, Jesus, want nothing but love from me; but I want so much love from you to be able to love you, because I miss it. You see, Jesus, I don’t realize what happens to me in the morning when I feel you [in Holy Communion]. Eh, Jesus, who would have thought that yours had to beat with my heart too?
And tell me… make me happy, Jesus; give me the consolation I ask of you… repeat to me those dear words you said to me on Sunday… Jesus: when will you become my husband?…
O Jesus, how I regret the temptation you sent me! But I always want to do your holy ordination.

Ecstasy 62

From Jesus, husband of his soul, he wants only a little more fervor and final perseverance. There wouldn’t be so many sins if Jesus made himself known to everyone, as he did with her (Cf. P. GERM. N. VII).

Sunday 24 November 1901.

O where are you, Jesus?… where are you?..
You know, Jesus, that I don’t seek any shelter from you… I, Jesus, just want a little more fervor and final perseverance.
Who enjoys, Jesus, your delights of love?… I always say that I love you, but yet I see… Jesus, husband of my soul!… How I like it, Jesus, to call you that!… But what would become of me, Jesus, without your frequent visits?… What would have become of my heart if you had not taken possession of it?… See, Jesus: if you made yourself known to all creatures, like you did to me, there wouldn’t be so many sins.
Or Jesus, or who would have ever thought…?

Ecstasy 63

Grateful for the many favors received from Jesus, she prays to him to always help and teach her, so that his life, like that of the blessed, is a continuous act of love (Cf. P. GERM. N. VI).

Tuesday 26 November 1901.

Is it possible, Jesus?… What have I ever done, Jesus, to deserve so many graces?… O Jesus, or why do you remain so idle in my heart? O come, help me to do some act of love with my mind and heart… Loving you without interruption!… You, Jesus, must not remain idle in my heart, as you did this morning… If you do not help me to do some act of love, how bad I feel!
You have to be my teacher. The masters of the world always teach with their voice, and you with suffering. Always suffering… And then you see, Jesus: all the other masters teach out of interest, and you do it with affection.
And then, Jesus, I am happy… and then I console myself, that then I will come to Heaven. Then then I will love you without intervals. These intervals get boring to me.
You are too dear, you are too kind… Jesus, give strength to my spirit.

Ecstasy 64

She seeks and wants only Jesus, ready to follow him to Calvary; she gives him her freedom, while her heart expands and tastes sweetness, which only she can give the mercy of Jesus (Cf. P. GERM. n. XXII).

Sunday 8 December 1901

O Jesus, may I become an instrument of your glory!… And all my sins will be the object of your mercy. Don’t you see, Jesus, that I take advantage of your goodness? You alone, Jesus, you alone I seek, you alone I want; and if I complain, Jesus, don’t listen to me.
Do not doubt, because your Gemma will follow you to Calvary… I know how to do too little, Jesus, to bless you and love you.
Or whose voice is this that I so distinctly hear in my heart? Is it you, Jesus, or am I deceiving myself?… yes, this calm that I feel, this sweetness makes me know that it is you.
Yes, Jesus, I give you my freedom, so that I may become a slave forever. Publish it loudly, Jesus, your love; publish my shame, as long as it is for your glory.
My heart expands, Lord… and feels sweetness that only the mercy of Jesus can give. But if you are so pleased to dwell in this heart, Jesus, let it melt.
Come… come, Jesus… come, strengthen my spirit… let me embrace you, my Jesus. Now I know how sweet your possession is. I know you, it’s you, Jesus. How good you are! Don’t command me to love you, because I owe it to you out of gratitude… And I will try to give you love and more love. What more do you want, Jesus?…

Ecstasy 65

She blesses Jesus who, although tired of her, never denies her his love for her. He seeks new love and new sorrows. He cannot bear to feel that his heart beats with that of Jesus. Happiness and graces that he draws from these sweet embraces (Cf. P. GERM. Nos. XVII and XXV).

Tuesday 10 December 1901.

O power of the love of Jesus! May your tenderness, Lord, overcome my coldness… Come, come, Jesus… Let me, Jesus, know my impotence more and more. Long live Jesus! that although he is tired of me, he never denies me his love for him. Let me say it again: I seek your love, I seek the pain, I seek the pain. No, I don’t deserve sweets; I didn’t deserve them, even though you grant them to me with such generosity.
What do you find, what do you find in me, Jesus? You will find weakness, misery, sins there. And I would like to tell you, now that I find myself completely filled with you, I would like to tell you: Go away!… But no: I feel you as good as you are. Let me, Jesus, remain in your heart again.
I can no longer stay, I can no longer stand, when I feel that my heart beats together with yours.
Indeed, Jesus, my happiness is great, and more and more I want to be in your dear presence; and I feel, Jesus, that my soul receives many special helps in these embraces. Not a day goes by, Jesus, that I don’t receive new benefits from you.
But no, Jesus, don’t command me to love you… But if you reveal yourself to my soul like this… if it’s your contentment… no no, I’m not asking you. Forgive my ignorance. Long live Jesus!

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