D like Dignity
What language do missionaries “speak”? Theirs is an alphabet of mercy, with letters that breathe life back into words and generate works
I still have before my eyes a girl who was dying of AIDS in our parish of Nefa in Cameroon.
I had been called to give her a last Christian farewell, a good journey.
As I entered her little room, I saw her again in her bed. Her eyes were out of their sockets, thin, you could count all her bones. She was breathing heavily. I could see by now that she had little left to live. She was perhaps in her early twenties to mid-twenties. In the prime of life, we would say.
Yet there she was, alone with her mother.
A flower that was drying up in the indifference and malevolent judgment of the neighborhood.
No one was giving her more water, confidence, to carry her scent everywhere.
But she was a person who had her dignity.
Today, thinking back to her (I can’t remember what her name was. No one had told me and I hadn’t had the courage to ask), I wonder what D.I.G.N.I.T.À means.
I tried to find a word for each letter. Perhaps it can help to understand it better and to give it, to recognize it to those who, for various reasons, no longer have it!
D for GIVE. I think it is being close to each person, sharing the most beautiful things with them. Not only giving, but also receiving: that is, giving to each other.
I as TOGETHER. Because one has to get one’s hands dirty, not stay away from those who are suffering. Do not say, for example, when invited to visit those in need, “I am afraid to disturb,” but get out of the house and knock on the door to let the other person into one’s life.
G for GRINTA. Often those who have lost hope need someone to give them the courage to face difficulties again and again. To not feel sorry for themselves, to think they are worthless.
N for INDEED. Against everything and everyone. The first friend of ourselves is us. We don’t always have to stand there thinking that others will come to our aid.
I for IMPREVISIONS. In life, not everything always goes well. There will also be difficult times (illness, bereavement) and we need to prepare for them. Don’t think that Someone has it in for us. Serenely (although it is not always easy to do so and not just say it), you walk. The road is not always flat, but there are descents and ascents.
T for TRADITION. It may happen that someone you trusted, abandons you, betrays you, because they have found important friends, from whom they can have what you cannot give. How many times has it happened to us to say, “but from him I just didn’t expect it.” This is what the Pope is talking about: the culture of discarding. When you are no longer interesting to those you used to call “friends” and they have dumped you, you find yourself alone. If you’re handsome, rich, snappy, a VIP, a politician on the crest of a wave, a soccer player, an actor…and everyone loves you, then there’s no problem. But then, time always does justice and you end up in the corner. You turn the page and you will never be talked about again.
Finally, the A. as (in) WAITING. Don’t wait for someone to care about you; go on living, don’t let yourself be sad, reconcile with your past and think positive.
Perhaps, all these words will serve little purpose, but to me they helped and still help me to give meaning to DIGNITY.
Source
- Father Oliviero Ferro
Image
- Image digitally created by spazio + spadoni